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I Haven’t Written Anything Lately

Posted in A Class Act by Linden Barrick on October 7, 2013
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I have not posted on my blog for one month. The words haven’t been flowing, or maybe I’m swallowing them along with all the emotions I’m attempting to hide. My emotions have been so raw lately, blood might ooze onto the page with every keystroke. An illness in the family, surgeries, hospitalization, and more surgery to come, and yet my life keeps moving on, day by day, while I don’t write.

My family is far away. The majority of my family members live in Missouri; I’m in Virginia. Being many states away makes it difficult when I know I could help if I lived closer. Helplessness, sadness, and guilt become braided together tightly enough to create a noose, strangling me and making me unproductive.

I have been alternating between bouts of intense prayer, times of fighting the liquid emotions that flow freely at inopportune times, and periods of numbness. Happy moments seem faded, but welcome, like an old pair of tennis shoes that had been drying in the sun.

News from Missouri has become more positive of late. Thank you, God. Hope continues to grow, and my numbness is starting to wane. So for today, a few words flow from my fingertips without too many emotions welling over.

No, I haven’t written anything lately. But prayer is powerful.

8 Responses to 'I Haven’t Written Anything Lately'

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  1. I totally understand. Praying for you.


  2. Hi Sis,
    Donnie and I have both noticed your absence and have missed you!
    I’m sure it’s very difficult being so far away in good times and not so good. Thank God for the many ways we can communicate our love, thoughts, prayers and well wishes. Give my love to all and so happy to see you writing again!

  3. Anna Labno said,

    Linden,

    I have a difficult time too. I need a break from reading and writing, but I have to submit my last paper. And who knows what the other person still might request. I’m tired. And I want to yell as well. I couldn’t find anything new to write today.
    And I’m so confused. People love my voice or hate it. Should I use my metaphors or not?
    I’ll pray tonight so we both find peace.:)


    • Thanks for the prayers, Anna. I need them…the news today from MO isn’t as positive as it had been, so I feel as if the words I wrote yesterday were written too soon. I’ll add you to my prayer list as well! Thanks for stopping by and commenting. It’s comforting to be reminded others struggle as well. Not everyone sits down and produces thousands of words every day. My frustration makes me believe it though.

  4. Bobbi said,

    Linden,
    Just getting time to read this in my hectic life. You are an amazingly strong woman with God as her protector. Your words give strength to others to help them find their way.

    Praying for peace to come to you and your loved ones.
    Believe,.
    Bobbi


    • Thanks, Bobbi! I appreciate the prayers and your encouragement! I will use them to try to write more soon. Leaving today with a bus load of middle school youth group members for a mountain retreat. I think it’s just what I need to refresh and realign myself!!
      Love!


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